Shouldn't I Be Dead?
by Allebasi
Summary: Nathaniel didn't die when he broke Gladstone's staff. Can he rebuild London, fight off his enemies, and truly defeat Death?
1. I'm Alive?

25/11/2008 19:04:00

I was trying to run, screaming, kicking, yelling, but I wasn't moving at all. I struggled to free myself of the invisible prison bars but they held fast and the skeletons just kept coming, relentless. I tried to scream for help but the cry was caught in my throat. Before I knew it,(1) the zombie-things had surrounded me. I gave a final kick and lay limp, defeated. I glared at my jailers, conveying what I thought of them.

"What is your name?" one asked, a gruesome fellow without any bone between his eye sockets. I responded with a shudder and attempted to turn away, only to find myself facing him again. Another corpse, this time missing a foot, scolded me, "We do not want to waste time. What is your name?" I glanced frantically around, looking for some escape, but to no avail. In my failure, I managed to murmur, "My name is John Mandrake."

This seemed to anger them, all three of them.(2) Thunder erupted around me, and bright flashes of light and heat flickered about. It seemed as though a great beast roared a battle cry in the distance. "That is not your name! Give us your true name not—" At this point they faded away. They just disappeared. Just like that.

After a short moment, I realized there was a quieter, calmer voice whispering in my ear. I had to strain, but I could just make out the words. "John, wake up. So much thrashing about is bad for you in this state. Calm down. Calm down." I gradually became easier to hear the strangely familiar voice. If I had had any breath in my lungs at the time, I would of sighed in relief. I had been dreaming.

"Urgh," I groaned. Why was I so sore, like I had just been blasted off a building by two marids imprisoned in a staff that had been struggling to get free for 100 years? I groaned again as it all flooded back to me. I felt that because I had been blasted off a building by two marids imprisoned in a staff that had been struggling to get free for 100 years. So then why, I wondered, am I still alive?

I cautiously opened one eye to see a very blurry world. I opened the other eye and after a moment my vision cleared and I discovered I was in a hospital room. Hooray, I thought grimly, my favorite place. I tried to turn my head to face where the voice had been coming from, but all I found out was I was in no health to be moving.(3) "Easy, easy. Don't try to move. You're hurt enough as it is." That voice again. He couldn't place that voice.

A face came into his view and he remembered immediately who's voice it was. "Kitty," he whispered, finding his voice quite hoarse and quiet. "Duh," she responded, "What do you have, a death wish or something? Nearly got yourself killed y'know. I haven't a clue how you survived." I let out a breath of disappointment. I was just about to ask why I wasn't dead. Instead, I thought up another question.

"I heard another voice, before yours. It wasn't you. Who else is here?" My eyes swiveled to the other end of my vision. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see her face turn bitter and hateful.(4) Her retort was equally sour. "Your little magician girlfriend is here."(5) I heard an elegant snort on the other side of my hospital bed. I knew at that moment who else was in the room and all I could do was restrain another groan.

"Ignore her, John. She's just some _commoner_ that claims she's a friend of yours." Ms. Farrar said the word commoner like it was the worst thing in the world. "If I were you," the sorceress continued, "I would send her away right now." I restrained myself from shaking my head. "No," I croaked. "This is a friend of mine. Kitty, meet Jane Farrar. She's a…" he paused for a spell, uncertain of what to call Ms. Farrar. Traitor? Friend? Government official? "She's an associate of mine. Ms. Farrar, meet Kitty Jones."

Before the unpleasant conversation could continue, a man entered the room. Undoubtedly a doctor and magician. "Ah, good, you're awake. I was worried you wouldn't ever wake up, for a while there." This scared me a bit, and I realized I had no idea how long it had been since Nouda had rampaged through London. However, I had no time to ask the question because he continued talking.

"I heard you had quite a fall. All of London has been talking about your near-death encounter. I'm amazed at the speed of your recovery. Most people wouldn't have woken up for another two weeks. At this rate, you'll be out of here in a month."

A month. That was a long time. I didn't even know how long I'd been asleep. Before long, the Empire's enemies would start attacking. Perhaps they already had. Who could possibly rise up to the leading position to defend the country, with Devereaux dead? A month was too long. I was getting out of here sooner than that.

I turned to Farrar. "Go get me some chalk."(6)

(1) Quite literally- I wasn't really capable of thought at the moment.

(2) Don't ask me how a skull can look angry. They just can, okay?

(3) In case you didn't infer this, I was informed by the sharp pain that shot down my spine. Ouch.

(4) Not that this was uncommon, but I thought I'd point it out.

(5) Since I didn't have a girlfriend, I thought this unlikely.

(6) Well, actually, I more of screamed out these words. Remember footnote 3?


	2. No!

Disclaimer: Kitty, Nathaniel, Bartimaeus, and other characters from this series are slaves. Johnathan Stroud owns them, and I'm just borrowing them. I DO NOT OWN THEM. All OC's are mine.

**NO!**

I groaned, yet again, as I forced my hand to draw the pentacle, to ignore the pain. I had forced Farrar to get me some chalk to use to summon Bartimaeus, and then (forcibly, again) sent everyone out of the room. I must be insane, (1) I thought. Maybe that was what happened to you after nearly dying. Maybe I should nominate a project to find out. (2)

I felt like I had been hit by one thousand bricks, after drawing a simple pentacle that I used to draw as easily as drinking some water. This made me all the more sure that I needed to talk to Bartimaeus, to find out how to heal faster. I began to speak, to call, and to summon him to me. I reached out my invisible hand and searched.

I found nothing. He did not appear. There was no boy or silver-plumed serpent standing opposite me. I stood there, bewildered. The only other time I had called and he hadn't answered was when Kitty summoned him. I had dismissed him before my close call with death and surely too little time had passed since then for another magician to summon him.

Moving as little as possible, I checked to make sure there was nothing wrong with my pentacle. No, I was certain it was perfect. (3) Perhaps… I tried to come up with possibilities, but it was like groping in the dark for a light switch. Perhaps I said the incantation wrong.

I repeated the words and I got the same result. I strained my ears for anything, the buzzing of a fly, a bumblebee's hum. Finally, I had small success. A very faint bell, ringing seemingly in the distance flew to my ear. I looked around, for anything that might be the clever djinni.

"Bartimaeus?" I called out questioningly. "Bartimaeus, are you here?" A faint wisp of smoke appeared and I thrust my arm out in celebration. Bad mistake. It took all my will to keep from screaming and scaring the people outside.

Slowly, the wisp of smoke took the form of what appeared to be a messenger imp, slow and dull-witted. Nevertheless, Bartimaeus had used this guise before. Who's to say it wasn't him? A cranky voice emerged from the ugly creature.

"You Nathaniel? Good. You got a message from Bartimaeus." Nathaniel was utterly confused. When summoned, you came. You didn't send a message, you just came. That was the rule. Or so it had seemed.

"Here's his message, word for word. 'Nathaniel, John, Mr. Mandrake or whatever your name is, I'm absolutely glad I didn't actually have to come when you summoned me. This probably the last you'll ever hear from me, unless we meet up again in Death. That's where I am now, you see. I'm dead. I was allowed to send one message and I'm sending it to you. Don't kill yourself. Not yours truly, Bartimaeus."

I just stood there for a minute, mute and uncomprehending. Bartimaeus couldn't be dead. He's been alive for five thousand years. He just couldn't be dead. How had he died, anyway? There was no way he could have died.

This shouldn't have been a big deal to me. He was, in a magician's point of view, just a dumb demon. But perhaps that I'd known him for seven years, that he was my link to my childhood, my first difficult summon, made it impossible to understand.

I would have screamed and cried, but I was practically dead, mentally and physically. So instead, I crawled into my hospital bed and slept. (4)

I was walking. I had no idea why, but I was walking through London. I think I might have been looking for something, but I didn't have a clue what it was. But whatever I was searching for, I went through every backstreet, every sidewalk, and every busy road.

Tired from my long walk, I walked into a comfortable looking restaurant. I ordered chicken fried chicken and rested. I was sitting there, eating my chicken, when a beautiful girl came over and sat next to me. "Hi there," she purred, "How are you, John?"

For some reason, I didn't care in the slightest that she knew my name. "Who are you?" I questioned lazily. Her eyes twinkled. "My name is Nyx. I want to take you somewhere. Bartimaeus will be there too, but if you don't want him there, I can keep him away from you."

Somewhere, something clicked in my brain. This girl's name was not Nyx. But I didn't remember her real name and who really cared anyway? My mind drifted away from the thought. "You just have to tell me your real name. I won't tell anyone, I promise."

And I nearly did what she said, but then Bartimaeus' death came back to me. She had said she would take me where Bartimaeus was. She would take me to Death if I told her my real name. I stared at her warily, "Go away. First oh so scary skeletons, and now beautiful girls, all trying to kill me."

Nyx looked hurt. "What do you mean? I would never try to kill you." She scooted a little closer. I pushed her away and got up. I wasn't done with the living yet. I wasn't going to let this Nyx girl take me to Death.

I woke up, sweating, crying, heart rate at a mile a minute. I looked around and saw Kitty, sighing with relief. "What's wrong?" I croaked. She smiled, once again with relief. "We thought you were going to die for a second there."

(1) If it had been Bartimaeus writing the footnotes here, I know what he would say. He'd write, "Nathaniel was probably thinking he was insane right now. He would be right." Dumb Bartimaeus.

(2) Of course, then I would have to make sure people were nearly dying. Maybe not such a great idea.

(3) Like everything I do.

(4) Looking back, I should have lie down on the ground rather than my bed. So much more comfortable.

Author's note: Nyx is the goddess of death in Greek mythology.


	3. I Don' Wanna Be a Demon

* * *

Disclaimer: Kitty, Nathaniel, Bartimaeus, and other characters from this series are slaves. Johnathan Stroud owns them, and I'm just borrowing them. I DO NOT OWN THEM. All OC's are mine.

**I Don' Wanna Be a Demon**

_Bartimaeus_

With my message sent, I floated over to a friendly-looking group of afrits, djinn, and foliots. "Hey, guys," I greeted them, "How's life?" That came out wrong and I knew it immediately. (1) One particulary nasty-looking afrit (2) hissed at me. I lowered my head slightly to acknowledge his greater rank. (3)

"You like making fun of this place, huh, pal? Well, you're gonna be here for the next eternity. Maybe you'd literally like to stay _here_, like right here. Hmmm, djinni?" This wasn't good. I had been here only a week or two, and now it looked like I was going to be here for a millennia or two. I didn't doubt the afrit could keep me here, either.

So, as it was what I had been doing for a long time, I ran. Unfortunately, I ran into a wall of the Underworld. Or Death. Or whatever it was called. The afrit and his gang trapped me. "Hi. Uhh…" I struggled to come up with a lie. "I was just going to get you some punch."

The afrit laughed a cruel, inhuman (4) chuckle and fired a Detonation, and then Sealed me to the wall. Pushing and pulling to get free did nothing. The group of demons snickered and left. I nearly panicked until I decided to transform to get free. I was frightened by the results. There would be no shape-shifting for me.

Truly worried now, I tried firing a Detonation. No luck there, either. No luck as in, I couldn't fire a Detonation. I was panicking by now.

Where were my powers?

* * *

_Nathaniel_

I was tearing into that delicious chicken fried chicken again. I really needed to start coming to this restaurant more often, or at least get the recipe. My thoughts, however, were interrupted by a girl who looked suspiciously like Kitty. For a second time. "Nyx," I spat out the word as if it was the worst thing in the world.

"Hey, it's not my fault I'm trying to kill you. I was enslaved thousands of years ago against my will. Otherwise, I'd be enjoying life and wouldn't give a care about you," she responded nonchalantly. (1) Hoping I could keep her busy until I woke up, I asked, "Who were you?" She smiled a bitter, sad smile. (2) "I don't honestly remember anymore. The daughter of some duke or lord. All I remember was that I was a noble."

She paused for a minute, and continued, "By the way, if you were hoping to keep me busy till you woke up, think again. I shudder to think what Death will do if I fail a third time." Oh, well, it was worth a try anyway.

I shoved away from the table and ran for the door. I should've figured she had magic of some kind. She just teleported to the door. (3) Instinctively, I raised my hand, and despite knowing there was nothing in it, threw my hand forward. Nyx exploded. Not pausing to figure out what had happpened, I pushed through the door and into the cold, rainy street. With a in-control expression on her face, Nyx appeared in front of me.

Not entirely certain what I was doing, I smiled, turned, and dove for a rain gutter. Remember for this next part that I had no idea what was happening. Before I knew it, I had eight legs, several eyes, and two mandibles. I had become a spider. In too much of a rush to worry about how it happened, I struggled to crawl up the rain gutter, but the water in it pushed me out of the water. (4)

However, I never hit the ground. The dream ended.

---------

I woke up staring at Kitty's worried face. That worry changed to confusion when I moaned, "I don' wanna be a demon."

* * *

_Nyx_

"You dared fail a third time? What is your excuse this time, slave?" Death roared at me. In my humblest, most innocent voice I could manage, (1) I squeaked, "The boy has magic, Great Overlord. This allowed him to get away until his dream ended, O Glory of the World." Death looked at me with that dark piercing stare he has.

"Do you dare lie to me? The only inferior humans (!) that have demonic magic are you and my other slaves. Or are you telling the truth?" I took this as a rhetoric question. When dealing with Death, it's always best to remain meek. I had felt and seen some of his meager punishments. I would hate to see an actual harsh punishment.

"I have made my decision!" Death boomed, "You shall be sent to Punishment (2) and he shall decide the severity of your chatise. Meanwhile, I shall send a Fury to scout out this demonic human."

Had it been a lesser being than Death, I would have argued that the Furies were out of date. He needed to be more modern. But, that just would have hurt me more in the end.

And so I went to Punishment.

* * *

Bartimaeus' Footnotes

(1)We were all dead, remember?

(2)No kidding. He was a Cyclops with snakes covering most of him except for his eye.

(3)I was currently in the guise of a dark-skinned boy right now, just to let you know. No prizes if you guess who it was.

(4)Well, that was kind of an obvious description, since he literally wasn't human.

* * *

Nathaniel's Footnotes

(1) This kind of creeped me out. How can you talk so calmly about being enslaved to kill people? Anyway…

(2) I almost felt sorry for her. Almost.

(3) I sure hoped she was getting good benefits from Death. I mean, who wants to be a demon-human thing?

(4) Does this remind you of a certain nursery rhyme? How embarrasing.

Nyx's Footnotes

* * *

(1) I could, after all manage a lot of voices. There were few voices I couldn't use, actually.

(2) Punishment is supposedly of the same race as Death, but no one really knows. Point is, he's good at punishing people. If you didn't figure this out by his name. Anyway...

* * *

Author's Foonotes

(!) If you've ever played Tales of Symphonia, you understand where I got the 'inferior humans' from.


End file.
